Improving Kids' Social Skills
You need good manners. It is not that we long for a world of pomp and venias. Nothing like that. It simply consists in the fact that the currently unweighted good manners constitute a passport to success, because after good eating, correct speaking and precise behaviour the quid of coexistence is disguised: respect for others.
It is clear that along with the arrival of adolescence, children become rebellious and adopt an air of sufficiency. This is natural and demonstrates the growth they are experiencing by reaffirming their personality.
However, as part of this process, they need to adopt three attitudes:
- Essential values are not changed by fashion or age.
- Criticizing is natural in these years, but proposing positive solutions is always better.
- To put oneself in the place of the other.
Without these ingredients, teenagers will grow up without having learned to handle themselves well socially. They will lack what has been called "social intelligence" - which is knowing how to reach people at the right time and in the right way - so useful in personal and professional life.
It is important for parents to distinguish between what is a stubbornness typical of the stage, and what is being badly educated. The aesthetic aspect of whether they wear longer hair or an earring, may upset, but these are tradable matters, understanding that it is typical of youth. What should never be compromised is respect for others. In short, this is the basis of good manners: sensitivity towards others.
Children are not born knowing good education and it is the duty of parents to instruct them in it. I think it's basically about showing them how to treat people, everyone with equal consideration, from a king to a beggar. In this, there is form and substance, because knowing how to thank, behave and talk to others, shows culture and respect for others.
Dads should put a stop to bad manners, they have to understand that they are drivers of their children.
Teenagers tend to live passionately, but all that energy needs to be channelled. That's why it's appropriate to help them fill their lives with something that gives them meaning, useful for themselves and society. Quite the opposite of a life dragged and vulgar.
Undoubtedly, every day spontaneity takes on a more predominant role in the whole social process. Thanks to it, parents and children are closer, generations have come closer and understood better, and it is even a value that helps the formation of one's own character: today it is considered fundamental to move in a climate of trust. But it is no less true that sometimes, shielded by "being oneself", one runs over others, their feelings and their space.
To use common sense and simply to put oneself in the place of the other. In other words, balancing character requires careful balancing between extremes.
There are manners that have gone up in smoke:
- Greeting an older person with respect, which means standing up when they enter where we are.
- Give the seat to the elderly or pregnant women.
- Be clean at mealtime and eat well, using napkins and cutlery as appropriate.
- Know how to listen and not interrupt someone when they speak.
- Respect the teacher's authority.
- Do not secrete in public or comment on family intimacy.
- Knock in front of a closed door.
- Turn the television or radio to a moderate volume.
- Offer help.